Are you on the hunt for the absolute best Haunted Mansion quotes that are perfect for Halloween? Join me (foolish mortals!) as I uncover the top quotes from every single movie and ride so you don’t have to go ghost hunting!
Ask anyone I know – the Haunted Mansion (and its variations across the world!) is my favorite Disney ride.
Hands down.
I adore the music, I love the haunts, and there’s something about crawling through a decrepit mansion that just gets me going.
And because of that obsession, I was always at the front row of every Haunted Mansion movie release.
I literally still remember the opening credits on the 2003 Eddie Murphy version and I was just 8 at the time!
So, whether you’re looking to relive the latest 2023 Haunted Mansion or want to return to the ride – I’ve got you.
This list of Haunted Mansion quotes will thrill you, make you chuckle, and remind you just how timeless this old-school Disney ride truly is!
Now are you ready to become that 1000th soul to pass through the Haunted Mansion?
Well, let’s wait and see…
Best Haunted Mansion Ride Quotes (Disney World + Disneyland)
1.“When hinges creak in doorless chambers, and strange and frightening sounds echo through the halls. Whenever candlelights flicker where the air is deathly still — that is the time when ghosts are present, practicing their terror with ghoulish delight!” – The Ghost Host
2. “Welcome, foolish mortals, to the Haunted Mansion. I am your host, your ghost host. Kindly step all the way in please, and make room for everyone. There’s no turning back now.” – The Ghost Host
3. “Our tour begins here in this gallery, where you see paintings of some of our guests as they appeared in their corruptible, mortal state.” – The Ghost Host
4. “Your cadaverous pallor betrays an aura of foreboding, almost as though you sense a disquieting metamorphosis. Is this haunted room actually stretching?” – The Ghost Host
5. “Beware of hitchhiking ghosts!” – The Ghost Host
6. “We find it delightfully unlivable here in this ghostly retreat. Every room has wall-to-wall creeps, and hot and cold running chills. Shhh, listen!” – The Ghost Host
7. “Actually, we have 999 happy haunts here. But there’s room for 1,000. Any volunteers? If you should decide to join us, final arrangements may be made at the end of the tour.” – The Ghost Host
8. “Oh, I didn’t mean to frighten you prematurely. The real chills come later. Now, as they say, “look alive,” and we’ll continue our little tour. And let’s all stay together, please.” – The Ghost Host
9. “Serpents and spiders, tail of a rat, call in the spirits, wherever they’re at!” – Madame Leota
10. “Creepies and crawlies, toads in a pond, let there be music from regions beyond!” – Madame Leota
11. “Wizards and witches, wherever you dwell, give us a hint, by ringing a bell!” – Madame Leota
12. “The happy haunts have received your sympathetic vibrations and are beginning to materialize. They’re assembling for a swinging wake, and they’ll be expecting me… I’ll see you all a little later.” – The Ghost Host
13. “In sickness and in… wealth. You may now kiss the bride. We’ll live happily ever after. Till death do us part.” – Constance Hatchaway
14. “When the crypt doors creak and the tombstones quake, Spooks come out for a swinging wake. Happy haunts materialize and begin to vocalize. Grim grinning ghosts come out to socialize!” – Singing Busts
15. “When you hear the knell of a requiem bell, weird glows gleam where spirits dwell. Restless bones etherealize, rise as spooks of every size!” – Singing Busts
16. “Hurry back! Hurry back! Be sure to bring your death certificate… if you decide to join us. Make final arrangements now! We’ve been dying to have you…” – Madame Leota
17. “They have selected you to fill our quota, and they’ll haunt you until you return! Now I will raise the safety bar, and a ghost will follow you home! (Laughs.)” – The Ghost Host
Phantom Manor Ride Quotes (Disneyland Paris)
The Disneyland Paris version of the Haunted Mansion (AKA: Phantom Manor) might just be my favorite rendition of the ride.
It’s far darker, has an incredible backstory about an overbearing father, and even touches on the Gold Rush.
Talk about attention to detail!
Oh, and don’t even get me started on the absolutely gorgeous and spooky soundtrack that differs from the US rides.
18. “From midnight to the ringing morning, we will waltz together, macabre beginner.” – Madame Leota
19. “Goblins and ghoulies, creatures of fright… We summon you now, to dance through the night.” – Madame Leota
20. “Spirits and Phantoms, on your proud Stallions, escort the beautiful Bride into the night!” – Madame Leota
21. “Warlocks and witches, answer this call, Your presence is wanted at this ghostly ball.” – Madame Leota
22. “Join now the spirits in nuptial doom… A ravishing bride… A vanishing groom” – Madame Leota
23. “You may not believe it, but beauty once lived in this house…And beauty lives here still.” – The Phantom
24. “There’s always my way!” – The Phantom
Haunted Mansion Quotes (2023)
I saw this movie super recently and sat there taking notes diligently with a notepad and pen (don’t worry, it was a virtually empty screening!).
These were a few of my standout Haunted Mansion quotes from the film, but the whole movie was packed with quips.
That’s right folks, the 2023 variation of the Haunted Mansion delivered on the spooks and the hoots.
It follows the story of a grieving widower called Ben who’s basically lost all interest in his astrophysics career after his wife dies.
But one day he’s called to investigate a haunted mansion.
And as he just so happens to have invented a camera that detects ghost particles, he’s the right man for the job!
25. “I help people see what they can’t see” – Alissa
26. “I’m too old to die!” – Bruce
27. “His power is beyond control.” – Gracey
28. “Be careful, death lurks around every corner.” – Bruce
29. “Ben, I just feel like I know you already.” – Hatbox Ghost
30. “If you’re willing to help me, I can give you what you want.” – Hatbox Ghost
31. “I’m curious about why a man his age was riding a chair?” – Doctor
32. “What was the cholesterol on her? Cheesesteak, tater tots, ice cream. She was going to the bone orchard.” – Bruce
33. “999 souls that reside here but there’s always room for one more!” – Hatbox Ghost
34. “Did I frighten you? Good. He’s going to be so excited you’re here. He loves guests” – Cleaver Ghost
Madame Leota Quotes
35. “I can show you what happened but it will cost you. $3.00.” – Leota
36. “Where death is not an ending but a new beginning.” – Leota
37. “We had summoned a terrible evil who prayed on Gracey’s grief.” – Leota
Harriet Quotes
38. “Do you have any idea what it’s like having a ghost horse run through your bedroom?”
39. “People… used to eat here.”
40. “The living and the dead belong in different places.”
41. “These ghosts definitely don’t want to leave.”
42. “It’s good that she’s not here. She’s at peace.”
43. “On days when I get really low, like really low – I’ll hear a train in the distance. I call those ghost winks.”
44. “Reverse seance. Count me in.”
45. “It’s not that young girl, I was driving by 9.”
46. “Ghosts like to fight.”
47. “It’s like the Captain Crunch of eggs.”
48. “Attics are historically terrifying.”
49. “Here is a pen and pad that I purchased from CVS.”
50. “A murderer in life now a murderer in death.”
51. “Now, if I’m gone for more than ten minutes, ring this bell. If I get lost, it’ll help me find my way back. See I have to be very raw in order to go to the other side. This is a picture of my dog that tragically moved to live on a farm. Actually, he got hit by a car. Burst like a water balloon.”
52. “Now, if I can communicate with William Gracie, I suspect he will have the answers that we need. And just to confirm, the only thing available to us is this French vanilla Yankee Candle?”
53. “I summon Madame Leota!”
Travis Quotes
54. “This place is haunted!”
55. “Nowhere feels right without him.”
56. “They were just running me home.”
57. “I make sure everyone follows the rules on the playground.”
58. “I know this feeling. They’re running from something”
Gabbie Quotes
59. “I’m gonna light a vanilla candle and it’s gonna be a gamechanger!”
60. “Don’t use flash…they don’t like that”
61. “It’s really only after midnight.”
62. “The hauntings just keep getting worse and worse.”
63. “Yeah, I just need to calm down, don’t I?”
64. “He can’t walk anywhere at night without a ghost following him around.”
65. Gabbie: This could change the course of your entire life.
Ben: That’s a risk I’m willing to take.
Ben Quotes
66. Ben: Why do you think I’m having a bad day?
Bartender: Because you smell like yesterday.
67. “I will show you things and talk about them”
68. “There’s this thing called power of suggestion.”
69. “Ghosts don’t exist. Life is dirt. We’re all dirt”
70. “Something followed me home!”
71. “It’s fine, Gabbie. I’m not afraid of a couple of ghosts.”
72. “Can I call you Ghost Baby?”
73. “I’m an ally. To you and all ghosts”
74. “Speaking of eggs-estantial…”
75.“I just wanted to see her one more time. She died alone.”
76. “She also was the world’s slowest runner.”
77. “These people, they can’t save me from my grief. But they can save me from you.”
78. Sketch Artist: What about his eyes?
Ben: They were right into his ocular cavity. Sunken if you will.
Sketch Arist: What about his nose?
Ben: No nose.
Bruce: No nose.
Sketch Artist: Why would he have a nose?
Father Kent Quotes
79. “That’s like having Michael Jordan play baseball”
80. “One man’s monster is another man’s Halloween costume!”
81. “My job is about having faith and I’ve got faith in you”
82. “The treasure I seek are in heaven”
83. “They’re gonna be deader.”
84. “The Lord moves in mysterious ways.”
85. “Your eyes were screaming yes.”
86. “She’s been doing reading at bar mitzvahs but gets a very good Yelp score.”
87. “She was missing half her face, so she was hard to understand.”
88. “It only sold about 9 copies, but hey, he’s not dead.”
89. “Am I proud Ben attacked an elderly educator?”
90. “I just have a bad back from all the feet I cleaned in Calcutta.”
91. “You’re not that scary. You’re really not. But you’re pretty terrifying. Can you turn around while I finish this? Thank you.”
92. “This guy was so petty you almost got to respect it.”
93. “Everything looks normal. But normal is terrifying.”
94. “God, give us a break. We don’t want to be haunted. There are so many bad people. Haunt them.”
95. “A ghost who haunts other ghosts? That’s not fair.”
96. “I work in Halloween supplies. I’m a fraud.”
97. “If this comes down to an exorcism, we’re in big trouble.”
98. “The power of Kent compels you!”
99. “Believe me, I know a con when I see one.”
100. “Hey look, we gotta talk about boundaries.”
Haunted Mansion Quotes (2003)
The 2003 Haunted Mansion film wasn’t quite the commercial success that Disney hoped it’d be.
But it’ll go down as a relatively accurate rendition of the ride’s IP with a bit of Eddie Murphy comic goodness thrown in.
It follows the story of real-estate couple Jim and Sara Evers who take a detour from a trip to the lake to look at a property.
Here, they meet the elegant Master Gracey and the other haunted souls of the house.
It turns out that Sara Evers looks a lot like the late Elizabeth who supposedly killed herself hundreds of years ago.
And you guessed it – she was the ill-fated lover of Master Gracey who’s desperate to reunite with her!
101. “Love endures all, no reason, no rhyme. It lasts forever and forever all the time.” – Madame Leota
102. Sara Evers: To love someone so much and then to lose them so suddenly. I can’t imagine how awful that must be. –
Master Gracey: If you truly love someone, they never leave. They remain in your heart forever.
103. “Find the thing that must be read, lest your heart be filled with dread.” – Madame Leota
104. Madame Leota: Evil and darkness have fallen this night. But now, to survive, you must gain new sight.
Jim: I must first gain new underwear.
105. Michael: Dad? Jim: Yeah, son… Michael: I see dead people.
106. Master Gracey: You have very beautiful children, Ms. Evers.
Jim: I kicked in some chromosomes, too.
107. Madame Leota: Dark spirits from the grave come forth. Lift us from the black. And show us, show us the way back.
Jim: Dark spirits? Hey, no dark spirits! Don’t you make no dark spirits come out!
108. “Tell me why not. This whole thing was my fault. We should’ve never been here in the first place. Supposed to be at the lake. We’d be sitting by a warm fire right now. And I made us come here. And now it’s too late.” – Jim
109. “Man, don’t think just because you pull out your sword I’m going to let you marry my wife.”
More Haunted Mansion 2003 Quotes
110. “They’re not ghosts. We’re just having hallucinations from that dinner that we ate. It was that chicken, it didn’t taste right.” – Jim
111. Ramsley: The Master must never know. Edward and his love will be reunited and this curse will be broken.
Jim: That’s not her, that’s my wife!
Ramsley: And what she sees in you, I’ll never know.
112. Jim: Well, great, I’m in, let’s get this key!
Megan: There’s only one problem: how do we get out of here?
Jim: Yeah, how do we get out of here?
Ezra: Well, there’s always, uh… my way.
113. Master Gracey: [Before departing for Heaven with Elizabeth] Can you ever forgive me?
Jim: What’s to forgive? You loved her.
Master Gracey: [Hands Jim a rolled-up document] Here. Take this.
Jim: What is it?
Master Gracey: The deed to the house. It’s yours. Do with it what you will. Sell it, keep it. Do whatever makes you and your family happy.
114. “When they died, they couldn’t find the light. And now, now they’re trapped. Doomed to wander the Earth for all eternity.” – Emma
115. “Why is everybody talking about a curse? Wait a minute, have you been talking to that crazy green gypsy in the giant paperweight?” – Jim
116. “This house has waited so long to have its shrouds of darkness lifted. And tonight, for the first time in… oh, so many years, I believe it may be possible that the story would finally end differently. Sara, do you believe that love is above second chances? About forgiveness?” – Master Gracey
117. “You are my world, my life! And I have loved you in death as I did in life!” – Master Gracey
118. “It would have been lovelier still if she’d ever had the chance to wear it. Now it serves only as a dark reminder of what could have been.” – Master Gracey
119. [during the wedding service] Ramsley : If anyone has any objections… [Jim bursts in] Jim : Yeah, I got a few objections!
120. “Don’t think just because you pull out your sword I’m going to let you marry my wife!” – Jim
121. “There are worse things that purgatory, Madame. I can assure you.” – Ramsley
122. “Tell me, Mr. Evers: Do you believe in ghosts?” – Master Gracey
123. “How wonderful. You’re going to kill a ghost.” – Ramsley
124. Jim: Wait a minute. You’re telling me this guy is dead and the only reason we were brought here is he wants to get jiggy with my wife?
Ezra: Pretty much. Are you upset?
Jim: The guy is dead and he’s trying to get with my wife and the house isn’t really for sale. Yes, I’m upset!
125. “You can’t help the dead, honey. They’re beyond help. That’s the nature of being dead.” – Jim
126. “The butler did it? You’ve got to be kidding me!” – Jim
Muppets Haunted Mansion Quotes (2021)
127. Gonzo: Great! Hey, since you’re on a break, can you contact somebody from the great beyond? Madame Pigota: I wish! But the Wi-Fi in here’s lousy. It’s like a total dead zone.
128. “And in peaceful rest lies Brother Claude planted here beneath his sod.” – Caretaker
129. Gonzo: Yes! Yes. A thousand times, yes. Pepé: Sí, and one time no way, José.
130. “Pumpkin spice lattes and a vampire bat, you must find a door with a glowing exat.” – Madame Pigota
131. “You know what- I just realized that this room has no windows and no doors.” -Gonzo
132. “If I don’t see some champagne cocktails and horsey durves ASPCA I’m outta here!” – Pepé
133. “Here lies good old Fred, a great big rock fell on his head.” – Caretaker
134. “There’s the first lady of Opera, Haunting Harriet. Searched for a tune but never could carry it.” – Haunted Mansion Caretaker
135. “Don’t worry folks, we’re not going to be explaining all the jokes!” – Ghost
136. “Hola Party Peoples! Brad Pitts!” – Pepe
More Amazing Muppets Haunted Mansion Quotes
137. “You heard the hogshead guys, time to dematerialize!” – Dr. Teeth
138. “Hey it’s a gig! And I get all the bones I can chew. Until they want them back! Ha!” – Rolf
139. “What happens if you don’t pay your exorcism bill? You get repossessed! Shocka-wocka!” – Fozzie as Hatbox Ghost
140. “We come not to praise Gonzo, but to bury him!” – Kermit
141. “Looks like we have some new ghosts- I mean, guests.” – Kermit
142. “Rest in peace cousin Huett. We all know you didn’t do it!” -Haunted Mansion Caretaker
143. Gonzo: Well, you finally got the party you wanted.
Pepé: What? Are you crazy? I said famous peoples, not scary peoples.
144. “We now invite you to sit back and relax, as our 999 residents proudly present…your funeral.” – The Host
145. “Dead prawn walking.” – Chauffer
146. “I shall be your host this evening. Your Ghost Host.” – Ghost Host
147. “Welcome foolish Muppets.” – Ghost Host
148. “If you think it’s too Macabre, follow that floating candelabra!” – Ghost Host
149. “Excuse Moi! But you are interrupting!” – Madame Pigota
150. “Serpents and spiders. Tail of a rat. Calling the spirits wherever they’re at. Pumpkins and ghoulies from last Halloween, awaken the spirits with your tambourine. Creepies and crawlies, toads in a pond. Let there be music from regions beyond.”– Madame Pigota
FAQs
Is the Haunted Mansion scary?
The ride itself isn’t so much scary as it is spooky.
The dark nature of the ride and the booming voice of the Ghost Host might scare more sensitive children.
But I’d say that the elements of the macabre in this ride will probably fascinate kids more than scare them.
Generally, I’d say go with yours (and your kids’) sensibilities – you know yourselves best!
What was the curse in Haunted Mansion?
There are different curses in the Haunted Mansion movies.
But in the 2003 Eddie Murphy flick, the ghosts are stuck in the mansion as the truth isn’t revealed about how Elizabeth died.
As a result, Gracey, Ramsley, and every other ghost that once worked in the house is stuck there!
Why is there a bullet hole in the Haunted Mansion?
Near the end of the ballroom scene in Disneyland’s Haunted Mansion, you’ll spot a bullet hole.
Although you might think this was left to represent the dueling brothers, it was actually left by a guest!
In the summer of 1974, a guest decided to fire multiple rounds into the wall (Anaheim Police confirmed the pistol to be a .22 caliber).
You can still spot the bullet holes in the ballroom wall to this day.
Is Haunted Mansion 2023 a remake?33
It certainly is remake of the 2003 Eddie Murphy film, but it has a slightly different plot line.
This remake follows the original ride more closely and features characters like the Hat Box Ghost and the Hatchet Bride.
It’s also slightly darker and has a greater emphasis on the grief of the central characters.
How much did Haunted Mansion 2023 cost?
The Haunted Mansion film released in 2023 is said to have a budget of around $150 million (with an equal advertising budget).
There you have it: a list of amazing Haunted Mansion quotes that’ll truly spook you silly!
Do you enjoy the Haunted Mansion ride at the Disney parks? Are you a fan of the movie adaptations? I’d love to hear your thoughts on these Haunted Mansion quotes in the comments below.
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